HEALTHY MANAGEMENT OF STRESS 3
Welcome to a new week as we conclude on Stress Management. Today we will be looking at some other principles as follows:
1. ACCEPT THINGS YOU CAN’T CHANGE
This principle is difficult to discuss; I can hear some of us saying ‘It’s not my portion, there must be a change’. The painful truth is that some sources of stress are UNAVOIDABLE. Bad experiences and events happen and they happen to people. Painful as this is, you may have to accept them because they can’t be undone. These include death of a loved one or serious illnesses, Economic recession, Rape, betrayals, late marriage, infertility and others. I am sorry but you have to accept these. You will note that in the Holy Bible, Apostle Paul had a certain besetting issue. He called it a messenger of Satan. He prayed fervently three times and the reply of the Lord was ‘My grace is sufficient for you , my strength is made perfect in weakness (2 Cor 12: 8, 9). In essence, the prayer was never answered; Paul had to live with it. The death of a loved one is very painful and alters a lot of the family dynamics. However, you can’t live your whole life on if only my father, mother, sister or husband was alive, If only my father did not divorce my mother, I should have married so so and so person. If only I didn’t have the accident where I lost my leg, if only I did not lose my job ETC .
Can we remember the Serenity prayer written by American Reinhold Niebuhr (1892-1971) ht
God grant me the
Serenity to accept the things I cannot change;
Courage to change the things I can;
and Wisdom to know the difference.
Another thing you may have to accept is the behaviour of people. The painful truth is that People do not change. Hence, please do not try to control the behaviour of other people. Bad behaviour causes a lot of stress. This is the reason you take time to train children and impart values to them early in life. Once children have the right values, they usually grow up as responsible adults. On the other hand, adults who are already formed rarely ever CHANGE!!11. Only the Almighty God can change any man/woman. The expectation that the person will change and become what you wish causes a lot of stress especially in relationships. It is wise to change your own attitude and change your expectations.
Forgiveness is very important when it comes way of accepting and moving on. Hmmm, this one is tough. Forgiveness is not always easy (believe me I know). There are certain experiences that pain no matter how much you try. The thoughts and pains never seem to go. However, forgiveness makes it easier to move on.
2. THINK POSITIVELY
It is wise to think positively in most of the cases. Having ‘supposedly difficult’ colleagues or relationships eventually prepare us for us for future relationships. If you are overworked, you are actually being prepared to handle difficult and bigger challenges in the future. I have seen persons who had horrific bosses being grateful many years later for being passed through fire. In addition the situation will give you the opportunity to learn new skills at work, discipline, leadership skills, time management ETC. Hence think positively and look at the big picture. You may be going through stress today, but years later you will find that you are grateful for all the stress.
Thanks for Reading