Healthy Management of Stress 2
Today, we will look at some other ways as follows:
1. ALTER THE SITUATION
Another method of handling stress is to alter the situation and make it nonexistent. You need to figure out what you can do to change things so the problem doesn’t present itself in the future. Like noted yesterday, the first step is to have an honest appraisal and assessment of the source of your stress.
In order to alter the situation it is pertinent to ‘Plan and Organize’. He who fails to plan is actually planning to fail. There is every truth in the above statement. Some of the issues that cause us so much stress stem for our lack of plan and organization. I fondly remember my mother’s organization and planning. We grew up in the days of ‘Christmas clothes’ for children. My mum always bought ours by the last week of August. She avoided the ‘season rush’ for clothes, other apparels, Christmas decorations and even groceries when the prices of such goods tripled. We therefore wore quality but ‘cheap’ (cheap because they purchased very early) clothes. In fact I have a friend (a medical Doctor in the US) who waits to buy clothes when they are on sale. That is wisdom and prudence!! It takes off a lot of financial Stress is almost nonexistent when you plan well. Plan your finances (I am guilty here), timing, preparation for examinations and interviews and all. Just getting to the park or commencing the journey early makes for easier ride when the road is challenging. It is wise to get to the airport early and avoid ‘missed flights’ which cause a lot of stress both financial and otherwise.
Compromises may be needed in some cases. Note that ethics, standards and quality should NEVER be compromised. The compromise should be in the area of personal opinions or views. Inability to compromise is one huge cause of marital crises and stress. Family decisions like where to live, children’s schools, the church to attend, culinary styles surprisingly cause a lot of marital disharmony and stress. These issues should be discussed amicably with both parties ready to make some compromises.
Time management; Time management is a bit like plan and organize. Some of the issues that give us stress arise from time overload. Some of us take on too much as already noted yesterday. Please it is wise to manage your time better. Miss USA 2016 Deshauna Barber was an officer in the US military, pursuing her Masters degree as well as contesting for beauty pageants. She credits discipline and effective time management for her ability to do all three. Please manage your time well; it reduces a lot of stress.
2. ADAPT TO THE STRESSOR
Another way of managing stress is to adapt to the stressor. In essence, if you can’t change the stressor, then change yourself. This is especially important in the home. Granted we all have our individual differences and preferences, there are situations where you can adjust to the other party. Note that this does not mean to lower your standards and learn to steal, lie , sleep around or use drugs. It means that you can learn to sleep with lights on, wake up early in the morning, learn to cook the meal a bit differently, adjust to a smaller house or car ETC.
In some cases, most of the stress is caused by unmet expectations. We all have our expectations of marriage, relationships, jobs and all. Having another person do the same thing differently may cause us a lot of stress. It is not wise to compare one person with another. Please note that we are all different individuals. Your mother does it this way and so your wife must do it same way. The last pastor, HOD, teacher, supervisor, roommate, colleague, friend ….did it in a certain way and that becomes your expectation of the next person. What the next person is doing may not necessarily be wrong but just different. You may need to change your attitudes and change your expectations.
Finally, please set realistic attainable goals. It is not easy to have a busy job, parent your children, run a business, get more degrees and pastor a church all at the same time. I am sorry, there is going to be a ‘Give’. One or two will suffer significantly amidst the stress you will go through. Please set attainable goals. Goals and deadlines are good; it falls into the category of ‘Good Stress’.
Thanks for reading